August 19, 2015 - Alex
A Lifetime Of Choices
In a recent post, I talked about my Mom, who lost a very short battle with pancreatic cancer five years ago. She was a special and unique woman. Cancer definitely took her too soon. I look back at my Mom and her life, particularly in years before she died, and sadly her demise seems eerily predictable. Heavy in the middle (a common trait in our family), a carb-heavy diet, virtually no exercise, and lots of process foods. Her refrigerator was filled with quick, easy choices from Costco. Shrimp cocktail, bags of frozen fruit for smoothies and more. I don’t remember her eating any salads, vegetables or the like. She did join me at the gym for a short-lived effort to do the right thing, but she did more talking than walking when we were there. But, looking back, this pattern started a long time ago.
I have five food memories from my childhood, excluding the times we went out to eat.
Corned beef hash. This is about my only memory that is reasonably healthy. Of course, I say that without really remembering what corned beef has actually is.
Duncan Hines Brownie Mix. We would regularly make these brownies that had a cream cheese layer on top. They were to die for.
Chocolate chip cookies. Another regular, it was not uncommon to walk into the kitchen to find several baking sheets on the counter with fresh-baked cookies cooling off. And we never ate just one. More like one dozen.
Girl Scout Cookies. This is where the story turns dark. Legend has it that our house (one of about thirty on our private street) was the fave for Girl Scouts wanting to rack up big sales quickly. There were four of us living in the house, and each of us would typically buy about 10 boxes of cookies. And the scariest part: My boxes would be gone in a week. It’s really astonishing to think that a single person can eat that much sugar in such a short span of time and not suffer any major damage from it. At least that’s how things appeared.
Coke. There were times where I was putting away a two-liter bottle of Coke per day. If I saw somebody letting their kid do that today, I’d intervene.
But again, this doesn’t include the times we ate out. Let’s not forget about trips to Kentucky Fried Chicken (always “extra crispy”, with mashed potatoes, a roll and a chocolate parfait for dessert), Steak n Shake (cheeseburgers, shoestring fries, sodas and milkshakes), Arthur Treacher’s Fish ‘n Chips (battered fish with french fries), White Castle and more.
Let’s face it. Even if I’m forgetting about the healthy meals from my childhood, it’s the bad stuff that I actually remember. I still clearly recall having this mindset after getting my first car, thinking to myself, “Wow, I can actually go to White Castle any time I want, without having to negotiate with Mom for the car.” Wow. Freedom was represented by fast food. With no apparent consequences at the time, I just went all-in.
Now, having just turned 50, I’m living that old adage: “You spend the first half of your life trying to kill yourself, and the second half trying to keep from dying.” How true.
This all came to mind today as I received the following video from a good friend who also just turned 50. Both of us have had great successes and great failures in the weight loss arena. And predictably, both of us are trying to “step up our game” now that we’re checking off the “50+” box. This video really paints in full color the life of regrettable decisions that we’ve lived. But more important, it reminds us that we were not the only ones making bad decisions that ultimately stacked the deck against us.
I’ve always made it a point to disconnect from the premise that losing weight gets more difficult as we get older. It always felt like a death sentence. But honestly — this is a fucking bitch.